High On ‘Lois’

when cartoonists stop caring.

Archive for the ‘baseball’ Category

Happy Confederate Memorial Day!

Posted by The Author on May 11, 2009

I have to leave for work in a little less than an hour* so for now I am just going to cover the weekend strips and take on today’s later.  If you can’t wait that long (and honestly, when it comes to H&L, who can wait?) check out Josh’s wise observations in today’s CC post.  I assure you, my own snark will be just as amazing (I hope).

Without further ado: Teh Muvvers’ Day Comix!

Hi and Lois, 5/9/09



Funny; this is what my mom usually wants for Mother’s Day, too.  I mean, except with her own kids, not Lois’s.  Or maybe both; I’m not sure.

Hi and Lois, 5/10/09


Nothin’ like taking a three-panel comic and spreading it thin over the Sunday format!  Well, at least this way we have more of a chance to admire the artwork and the strange goings-on inside this Connecticut diner.  Would I want to eat breakfast with this family?  Sadly, no.  Chip is listening to his Walkman (trust me, it’s a Walkman, not a new-fangled iPod — unless someone doesn’t know how to depict one) while Ditto solicits the baseball apparel-clad youth in the next booth (I still haven’t found any kids with that level of enthusiasm for baseball — are comics children a different breed?) and Hi raises the kids’ hopes for a fantastic homemade breakfast that will never come, thowing them into a state of shock, like Dot in the second-to-last panel.  You know why you never get this at home, Chip?  Because Mother is dead tired by nine AM and all she can manage to do it throw a couple of bowls of cereal on the table and call it a day.  Four children?!  What was she thinking?!

Anyhoozle.  Whilst I enjoy breakfast out on occasion, I don’t think I’d do it on Mother’s Day morning.  What is it about Mother’s Day and breakfast/brunch?  Why isn’t it traditionally a drinking holiday?  I have so many questions, but alas, I must leave you.  Happy Belated You-Know-What Day.  I love you, O Mother of Mine.

*Take a shot every time I mention that I have a job now!


Posted in baseball, current events, google-eyes | 6 Comments »

This barely qualifies as Monday.

Posted by The Author on May 4, 2009

Back from my mini-vaycay.  I have returned to the working world.  Huzzah.

Hi and Lois, 5/2/09


At first I thought this was the not-very-frequently reoccurring H&L character Mr. Waverly, minus his trademark wrinkly fisherman’s hat.*  He usually appears to talk about things like veterans, and The Good Old Days.  This would certainly be a new deal for him, erecting a wall between him and the cruel world outside.  But, look!  This fellow’s fears are not unfounded, considering the inky-black sky in the middle of the day.  Nuclear winter, perhaps?  Well, if that were the case, I’d be less worried about putting up a fence and more concerned with, like, being melted and stuff.

Hi and Lois, 5/3/09


More baseball!  That does it: I’m adding a “baseball” tag.  (I know, right?!)  It comes up more frequently than golf.  Also, “adorable baby antics”, or something.  They are too frequent to ignore.  Can anyone actually hear what Trixie is saying… er, thinking?  Can Dawg hear her?  Can he read the thoughts of the young and innocent? If he can, he’s probably sighing and rolling his eyes along with the rest of us.

So, Ditto to set up those cardboard figures of baseball players in the yard so that he can berate his wise-cracking sister?  I approve!

Hi and Lois, 5/4/09


Yeah, you big tub-o.  If you eat another Cheeto, your pencily neck might not threaten to snap in half.  Best hand the key to your husband, who is surely responsible enough not to gorge his blue-sweatered-self on delicious trans fats and high fructose corn syrups** and partially hydrogenated vegetable oil and… excuse me, I’m craving some Oreos now.

Go U Conn!

*The fact that I know minute details about this character without actually looking it up makes me very sad.

**Don’t you know what they say about it?  Oh, no worries, it’s natural.  Just like the bubonic plague.  And fire ants!

Posted in baseball, from the mouths of babes, google-eyes, horror | Leave a Comment »

Someone who doesn’t watch sports tries to explain sports-related comix.

Posted by The Author on April 5, 2009

Hi and Lois, 4/5/09


Uh-huh.  What is this fixation all the youngin’s seem to have with baseball?  I have never found the sport to be very interesting.  In fact, I’ve attended a total of maybe two actual games, and was bored silly throughout; I never see it on television, not even by accident.  In contrast, I went to a hockey game recently and was almost never bored: hockey just moves so quickly, and is so fluid, and luck can change in a matter of seconds. Baseball, on the other hand, is more like football, in which there is action for five to ten seconds and then long periods of anguish and waiting and me going argh erhg bah I am so bored.  I still like football better than baseball, though, because guys tackle each other.  Actually, I have found that I kind of enjoy seeing guys tackle each other, no matter what the occassion: football, hockey, boxing, figure skating…  I don’t know what that says about me.

But I digress.  Despite Ditto’s admirable enthusiasm for An Old-Fashioned American Sport (an almost obsessive enthusiasm, I’ll say, considering he’s just going to be sittin’ in his living room watching the telly,), he conks out 1/9th of the way into the game.  There’s something weird and disturbing about the way Hi is cradling his son in the last panel: though sleeping, Ditto is still grinning, clutching a baseball like a wire mother, emitting a single Z from his gaping maw.  And throughout, Lois remains silently bemused.

One hundred and sixty-two games?  Is that even possible?  How many hours of baseball-watching is that?  I am depressed.

Posted in baseball, crossed arms, current events, stubbiness syndrome | 5 Comments »