High On ‘Lois’

when cartoonists stop caring.

Archive for the ‘2 panels 1 joke’ Category

I guess they had an early tee-time that day.

Posted by The Author on May 27, 2009

Hi and Lois, 5/27/09


Oh, man.  Two panels, no jokes.

Now, personally, I love worms.  Yes, really.  I think they’re cute.  Perhaps it’s the fact that they’re tiny and have no terrifying legs or eyes to contend with.  And they eat rubbish and poop out dirt.  Cute!  So Trixie’s intentional damnation of said worms is a little disheartening.  Yes, yes, circle of life and food chain and all that jazz; birds gotta eat, fish gotta swim, blah blee blah.  I’m all for that.  I love birds, too.  However, I don’t go around tossing baby rabbits to the hawks.

Also, what kind of effed-up soil do the Flagstons have if worms are just wriggling on the surface?  That is not so cute.


Posted in 2 panels 1 joke, from the mouths of babes, half-assed, horror | 1 Comment »

Tuesday? More like TWOsday!

Posted by The Author on April 28, 2009

Hoo-dee-doo.  According to my stats I got a (baffling) thirty-seven hits per day for the last two days of my absence.  Lack of H&L makes people visit more?  It is a mystery.


Hi and Lois, 4/28/09


This car salesman looks familiar… at least, in the second panel he does.  Apparently the sanguine movie theater employee from last month quit his job at the Megat 8 Cinemas and took up dealing cars.  A little less hair, yes, but it’s definitely him.  Anyhoozle.  I didn’t think Hi’s kids were still of the age that they needed constant distraction in the car, lest they tear each other to bits arguing over who crossed the Invisible Line dividing the backseat.

The car doesn’t strike me as something Hi would drive.  It’s too Lincoln-y.  Like something my grandfather would own, in white no less.  Also, he shouldn’t go around with a blank license plate like that.

Hmm… I think, arguably, this could be categorized as a 2 Panels 1 Joke.  I mean, take away the first frame and the salesman’s happy-face, make CARS more prominent, and you’ve got a single-paneler similar to The Flying McCoys*.  YannowhutImean?

Hi and Lois, 4/20/09


What’s this?? A comic from forever-ago?  Yes.  There are a few H&Ls from the last few weeks that are too strange not to make some sort of comment.

The Nostalgia Channel.  Is there such a channel?  Technically yes: but in the past.  It’s now called the AmericanLife TV Network and it reruns television series from the 50s and 60s.  Owned by the Unification Church.  Consistent money-loser.  I bet you did not know these things.  So, are they watching television in the past, then, or is Hi just experiencing early on-set Alzheimer’s?  That would be sad.

Hi needn’t explain what they’re watching.  Lois should be able to figure it out on her own.  And if I were here, my response wouldn’t be a cheery “So, what do you think?”, it would be “Why on earth would you do such a thing when we have a perfectly good Xbox** sitting three feet away?”  Ditto is obviously not enjoying it, as he has already degenerated into scrawling the names of these shows on the walls.  There is no escape, is there?  A heavy storm cloud hangs over Hi’s head at his son’s insipid comment.  “People arent [sic] as funny in black-and-white.”  Ever seen Buster Keaton?  Young FrankensteinDuck SoupTop Hat? The Women (the old one, not the terrible new one)?  You ignoramous!

Since I am now a nine-to-fiver (or more accurately, a seven-to-twoer; or a whenever-I-am-scheduleder), I can’t stay up ’til Hey-Ho PM and write about the next day’s comic.  I guess I could just do it in the morning, but that means I would have to wake up even earlier and I would not be as funny.  Those entries would read something close to “WHAT WHAT THIS MAKES NO SENSE I EFFING HATE THIS COMIXXZGHZBSVVA” and we don’t want that, now, do we?

*I apologize, Glenn and Gary McCoy.  You are much, much funnier than these hacks.  I wish I could find a .jpg of your “scooter” comic that made me el-oh-el.  Oh, gosh, I’d describe it, but it would be better if you just saw it.

**Fer reals, I do own an Xbox, but I mostly use it for playing Rock Band.  I like to play!

Posted in 2 panels 1 joke, half-assed, pop culture, stubbiness syndrome, wtf | Leave a Comment »

The April Fool’s that comes in the middle of the month

Posted by The Author on April 14, 2009

So… comics.

Hi and Lois, 4/15/09


Ah-HA!  There’s that second Tax-Time comic I was expecting.  And luckily it’s only funny to accountants!  The first panel is totally superfluous, you know that, don’t you?  I think that should be a new category.  Something like… “two panels, one joke”.  No cups, though.  Ahaha, I hope no one got that one!

Er, Mr. T, I think that if you’re only just now getting around to filing your taxes, on the very day that said taxes are due, then you’re going to have a few problems.  And then the blatant illegal requests.  I like the taxman’s magical desk, though: the sign in the background stays the same, but the tabletop tilts like one of them old-fangled boxes with the maze inside and you have to guide the little ball through.  Okay, that’s a reach, but I couldn’t find a shorter term for such a box, except “Labyrintspel”, and that’s pretty obscure, don’tcha think?

The sketchy, thick-lined artist is back.  And Thurston is blond again.  Manic-Depressive Comix!

Posted in 2 panels 1 joke, current events, munny, mutations, skipped periods | Leave a Comment »